Run Jenni, Run











{June 3, 2013}   06.03.2013 – June Goals

I have not been feeling up to writing lately.  Mostly because lots has been going on, and the blog is the first thing to fall off the back burner when stress kicks my life inside out. 

School is out on Wednesday, but that does not mean my work is over.  I am planning on volunteering for PreSchool over the summer at an elementary school.  I lucked out and got one that’s less than ten minutes from the boyfriend’s house.  That’s a nother major step…I’ve pretty much moved in with the boyfriend, thus making the boyfriend, the roommate.  In addition to volunteering, I am trying to pick up a second job…hopefully reprising my role as a deli clerk at Publix.  There is a Publix about 5 miles from my house, which is really a blessing when it comes to job searching for something easy to get to and that I know I can do for at least two or three months before school starts back up in mid-August. 

In fitness, I paid for the unlimited pass to Yoga this month, and I am hoping that I actually get a chance to use it.  It is nice to know I can go whenever I want, but I am going to be bummed if I end up working so much that I basically flushed $100 down the drain…which is not good considering I only have about $150 to get me through this month (hence the need for a second job).  The moral of the story is it cost to keep sane while also working on a teaching certification.  Hopefully all will work out and I will be making enough to help out around the house with groceries and still have money for gas and fitness for the rest of the month.

Healthy eating has fallen off for a few weeks, but I am hoping that filling my time with things to do will basically force me back into a better eating routine.  I am maintaining weight right now, but I would rather be losing it. 

Later Days,

-Jenni.

Advertisements


Today at 3:40 in the afternoon I ate a quick PB wrap and checked my mail.

By 4:00, I was getting ready to start Insanity with a major chip on my shoulder.  The chip on my shoulder was something that someone from my past life had posted about her weight loss success.  What most people don’t connect is the fact that she has most likely reached that success in very unhealthy ways (i.e. It’s easy to lose weight when you’re spending your grocery money on drugs).

At 5:00, I collapsed in my kitchen for reasons that I am not fully aware of.  The most likely reasons include the combination of all the stress I’ve been feeling lately mixed with my decrease in calories by at least 1000 per day…and the fact that I let someone else’s life get to me.  And in reality, I am always letting someone else’s life get to me.  There is always going to be someone who has it better, someone skinnier or richer.  There is nothing I can do to change that, because even my best self is going to have an enemy.

So, I have decided to rethink my goals.  Not my major goals.  I would still like to lose weight and I would still like to get as fit as I possibly can.  But I am rethinking how I am going about doing this.  I still want to do Insanity, but it might be better to cut it down to three or so days a week.  I am not completely 100% on this change, but it’s probably going to happen whether I want to or not.

I will basically be switching to my summer workout plan before summer actually gets here.  Which is Insanity, gym, and running.  I would be throwing Hills back into the mix, which might actually help me because it would get me doing something socially again.  That was something I used to look forward to, and I let it drop away so quickly again.  It’s always the first thing I bump off my list, but then I realize that it is one of the things that I need.  In adding Hills back into the mix, I will probably need to invest in some running shoe, but I will cross that bridge when I come to it.  Insanity will be done Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  Thursdays will be reserved for running.  The other days will be gym or some other form of fitness.  I am still planning on checking out the Karma Yoga class on Sunday, and I am hoping that will fall into my routine.  I will cross the Hot Yoga bridge when I come to it in May.  I should be straightened out by then, so I don’t see why it isn’t something I could add.  Saturday or Sunday I will probably add a run or walk/hike whenever possible.  If I am feeling able, I’d still like to go on my hike that I have planned for Saturday, but again it’s all in how the next few days plan out.

One of the hardest things for me to hear is that I’m not allowed to do what I want to do.  And since what I want to do seems to be pushing my body too far, I am stuck hearing the hardest thing for me to hear.

I’ll be back with a full update tomorrow.  Hopefully the doctor will have some good news.

Later Days,

-Jenni



et cetera